Despite nationwide improvements in paid family leave, balancing a career and becoming a mother remains one of the biggest challenges that female physicians face. Questions swirl around the appropriate amount of leave to take, coming up with childcare arrangements, and how becoming a mother will affect a doctor’s career trajectory. With these questions in mind, we turned to Dr. Bonnie Koo, a mother, practicing dermatologist, and financial blogger at Miss Bonnie MD. Before becoming a doctor, Koo worked for Morgan Stanley. She uses her finance background to educate female physicians on her blog. In a wide-ranging interview with Physician Sense, Koo covered many motherhood topics, including the ones mentioned above as well as those pertaining to personal finance. Here’s what she had to say. Maternity leave Koo says this will vary from mother to mother, but she took 16 weeks, which is 4 more than the stock answer of 12 weeks that most people take. “It’s hard because there’s what the woman wants to take and what they can afford to take,” Koo says. Employed physicians and doctors in private practice often find themselves in different circumstances, Koo says. Employers will cover leave through short-term disability. This doesn’t happen in private practice settings, she explains. First time physician mothers need to plan how much time they want to take, and either save vacation days or their salary. “Ultimately, it’s whatever the woman wants, but you’re going to want to give yourself at least 12 weeks,” she says. “The whole country just needs to shift the way it thinks about maternity leave in general.” Career impact Koo says that maternity leave and motherhood will definitely affect your career, but the extent of the effect is largely the result of where you work. If you work in an academic institution and want a leadership role or a professorship, “your absence will affect things,” Koo says. In many cases, it’s simply a case of out of sight, out of mind. If you’re a physician who works in a group setting, like Koo does, she says the impact on your career is less harsh. You simply won’t be making money while you’re on leave and consequently not seeing patients. “When women become pregnant and take leave, everyone has an opinion about it — whether they say it or not. Our society needs to change as a whole on that.” Balancing a career and motherhood Koo says that medicine attracts a lot of type-A, driven, achievement-oriented women. When these women become mothers, they think that little changes for them beyond adding mother to the list of roles they play. “A lot of us think we’ll be able to do a lot of things despite being a mom,” Koo says, “but that ends up not being true.” Motherhood may cause some women to recalibrate their personal and career goals, Koo says. She adds that recalibration is OK. It may even involve working less. “It’s a personal choice,” she says. “I don’t think it’s right or wrong. I do think it’s extremely hard to have a full-time career and not feel guilty about being a mom. Some women find it isn’t sustainable and want to work less. But these decisions aren’t forever decisions.” If you ultimately decide to dial back your hours, there’s nothing stopping you from adding to your schedule once your children require less of your attention, Koo says. Childcare and support needs According to Koo, for some reason, modern professional women think they’re supposed to do everything themselves when it comes to raising a child. “That saying that it takes a village comes from a place of truth,” Koo says. “It’s not normal for one person to do everything. There’s a lot of pressure to think that you don’t need help. If you have a family and you like your family, you can’t beat grandparents helping you with out with childcare.” Koo also says that postpartum depression is likely higher among doctors, who are used to having a lot of control over situations and are suddenly confronted with a child that has a mind and schedule of its own. Having a support structure already in place is critical, she says. That support structure will prove even more essential if you choose to return to work. “Most female physicians aren’t stay-at-home moms,” Koo says. “Part of saving up for maternity leave is paying for expenses while you’re not working.” Childcare may be one of those expenses, and if you don’t have family to help, you’ll likely be facing the choice of a nanny or daycare. “The most expensive option is a nanny,” Koo says. “It’s also the most flexible.” Nannies are a good option for doctors who don’t work set hours, Koo says. You might not always be available to pick up your kids when daycare closes. The flexibility of a nanny is also highly beneficial for physician couples. She adds that you should always pay nannies on a W2. Source
