Disclaimer: I love my job. I love being a doctor and forever will and most of all I love my patients. I just felt the urge to write about a constant challenge, well very normal in the road to becoming an MD and some tips on how to overcome them, and so here goes – Have you ever felt the following –? Duty days feel like forever, you’re just about to start the day but wishing it already is about to end and you just want to go home and nurture your relationship with your bed. You find your thoughts wandering into questions like- “Am I really meant for this?” “I don’t think I’m for this.” You’re totally lost, not literally, but you just feel like you’re stuck. You sometimes question if what you’re actually doing will lead to anything fruitful. You find yourself so stuck that you can’t think. It always seems to be “one of those days.” Well if you ever felt or still feel that way and you’re in medical school then you’re probably suffering from a diagnosis of Med Life Crisis, nope I didn’t misspell it, it is what it is. I probably mentioned on my previous blog posts that I never had any ambition other than to be a doctor way back then. I was driven and filled with purpose but I was so frustrated when I was in my fourth year of medical school, that’s the usual year when we begin going on hospital duties. It was all good until one day I found myself demotivated and well, just STUCK. I hated the feeling, I was supposed to want to be a good doctor, right? But why the sudden feeling of self-doubt? Although I didn’t allow it to overcome my duty as a medical clerk back then I still didn’t understand why I had those thoughts, and when I did self-internalization I didn’t have any other issue except med life-related challenges add to that the fact that it was both physically and emotionally draining having to go on 24-36 hour duties then. But as they say, there is always a purpose behind anything we encounter, here are some lessons I have learned – You don’t need to have everything figured out. Sometimes all you need is a little dash of patience, it can’t come like instant noodles, the more you squeeze your brain for answers the more it will evade you, besides the journey of having it all figured out is the whole meaning of what life is. You can move forward by just staying where you are. Movement doesn’t mean literally propelled to walk forward, sometimes it can happen when you’re just present at the moment. Don’t fall into the habit of comparing yourself to others. We are all made to be individuals, on our own. The pattern of one’s life is unique just like our own DNA, we all have unique codes and we’re made to be someone greater apart from ourselves and not others. Remember why you started in the first place. Whenever you come to a point where it gets tired and draining it’s nice to reground yourself by asking your primary purpose on why you’re doing what you’re doing. Go back to the time when you really wanted to be a doctor then and appreciate the present and look forward to the many patients that need you. Purpose-filled life, right? Starve your distractions. Feed your focus. At the end of the day it’s really all about how much of yourself are you willing to give to others and how much of you are you willing to keep to yourself; it’s all about drowning the noise of the world and listening to your heart and what it’s saying. We all reach crossroads in one way or the other, even the most goal-oriented individual does, but what we do right on that fork where we may either turn right or left is what matters and whatever path you choose, make sure it’s what you really want and hey, enjoy the journey, in this case, the road to MD. Source
