Specialty Stereotypes in Medicine: Which One Are You?

The Specialty Stereotypes: Why Surgeons Are Gym Bros and Radiologists Are Vampires

1. The Surgeon: The Gym Bro of Medicine

• Confidence bordering on arrogance—check.
  
  
• Protein shakes and pre-workout stashed in their locker—check.
  
  
• The belief that "scalpel skills" translate to all life skills—check.
  
  
• If they’re not in the OR, they’re probably lifting weights.
  
  
• Favorite catchphrases: "Cut first, ask questions later" and "Sleep is for the weak."
  

2. The Radiologist: The Vampire of the Hospital

• Avoids sunlight at all costs, thrives in the darkness of the reading room.
  
  
• Speaks a cryptic language of densities, shadows, and "differentials."
  
  
• The only person who actually enjoys looking at thousands of grayscale images.
  
  
• Can diagnose a rare disease in a film but struggles to find their way to the cafeteria.
  
  
• Favorite excuse for avoiding rounds: "Still reading out studies."
  

3. The Emergency Medicine Doc: The Adrenaline Junkie

• Runs on caffeine, chaos, and minimal sleep.
  
  
• Loves solving medical mysteries but hates paperwork.
  
  
• Somehow manages to stay unfazed by trauma, codes, and ridiculous patient complaints.
  
  
• Often spotted wearing comfortable shoes, carrying a giant coffee, and shaking their head at the latest "worst shift ever."
  
  
• Catchphrase: "I saw it all last night."
  

4. The Dermatologist: The Chillest Doctor Alive

• Always well-rested, glowing skin, and somehow never in a rush.
  
  
• Has a work-life balance that makes other specialties jealous.
  
  
• Believes in the power of sunscreen more than any other medical intervention.
  
  
• The only specialty where Botox and sunscreen are discussed more than antibiotics.
  
  
• Catchphrase: "That’s just eczema."
  

5. The Anesthesiologist: The Hospital Ninja

• Arrives before the surgeon, disappears before the patient wakes up.
  
  
• The only doctor who gets paid to put people to sleep and monitor them silently.
  
  
• Lives in a constant battle with the surgeon over blood pressure and "time left in the case."
  
  
• Knows more about pharmacology than anyone but pretends it’s no big deal.
  
  
• Catchphrase: "I gave 100 of prop, see you in a few hours."
  

6. The Internist: The Walking Encyclopedia

• Thinks in flowcharts and algorithms, loves a good "differential diagnosis."
  
  
• Can recall obscure research papers from 15 years ago but forgets their own lunch.
  
  
• Believes no patient is "straightforward"—there’s always an underlying issue.
  
  
• Will spend an extra hour debating whether a sodium of 134 is worth correcting.
  
  
• Catchphrase: "Let’s consider the bigger picture."
  

7. The Psychiatrist: The Human Lie Detector

• Can read body language better than a detective.
  
  
• Always calm, even when dealing with absolute chaos.
  
  
• Has mastered the art of nodding slowly while saying "Tell me more."
  
  
• Everyone secretly wants to ask them for free therapy but never dares.
  
  
• Catchphrase: "And how does that make you feel?"
  

8. The OB/GYN: The Ultimate Multitasker

• Delivers babies, performs surgery, and manages primary care—all in one day.
  
  
• Never knows when they’ll get sleep, so they just accept exhaustion as normal.
  
  
• Loves talking about cervixes, contractions, and hormone levels at lunch.
  
  
• Can survive on four hours of sleep and a granola bar.
  
  
• Catchphrase: "Push, push, push!"
  

9. The Cardiologist: The ECG Whisperer

• Can interpret an ECG in five seconds but spends 30 minutes explaining it.
  
  
• Obsessed with blood pressure, lipid panels, and beta-blockers.
  
  
• Feels personally offended when a patient ignores their "low-sodium diet" advice.
  
  
• Favorite activity: Stress-testing both patients and colleagues.
  
  
• Catchphrase: "We need a stat echo."
  

10. The Orthopedic Surgeon: The Ultimate Bro

• Thinks 90% of medical issues can be solved with "more calcium and PT."
  
  
• Can bench press more than most of their patients weigh.
  
  
• Uses the words "nail it" and "screw it" both literally and figuratively.
  
  
• Prefers to communicate in grunts and minimal words.
  
  
• Catchphrase: "Let’s fix it in the OR."
  

11. The Pediatrician: The Kindest Soul in the Hospital

• Can diagnose an ear infection while being covered in glitter and stickers.
  
  
• Has mastered the art of speaking in soothing tones even in high-stress situations.
  
  
• Has a pocket full of lollipops, bubbles, and hand sanitizer at all times.
  
  
• Has the patience of a saint but will throw hands if someone is rude to their tiny patients.
  
  
• Catchphrase: "It’s probably viral."
  

12. The Pathologist: The Ultimate Introvert

• Loves dead people and microscopes more than socializing.
  
  
• Writes long, detailed reports no one actually understands.
  
  
• Thrives in a lab with no patient interaction whatsoever.
  
  
• Knows what every disease looks like but never has to treat them.
  
  
• Catchphrase: "Please correlate clinically."
  

13. The Nephrologist: The Forgotten Genius

• Understands acid-base balance and electrolyte levels better than anyone else.
  
  
• No one knows what they actually do all day, but they’re always busy.
  
  
• Can talk about urine for hours without getting bored.
  
  
• Only gets consulted when the kidneys have completely given up.
  
  
• Catchphrase: "Let’s check a BMP."
  

14. The Plastic Surgeon: The Perfectionist

• Loves symmetry, fine details, and aesthetics.
  
  
• Will point out a stranger’s facial asymmetry just because.
  
  
• Has mastered the art of convincing people that their procedures are "totally necessary."
  
  
• Everyone assumes they only do nose jobs, but they do trauma reconstructions too.
  
  
• Catchphrase: "We can make that look better."
  

15. The Family Medicine Doctor: The Jack of All Trades

• Can diagnose a sinus infection, manage diabetes, and deliver a baby in one visit.
  
  
• Somehow remembers every patient’s entire family history.
  
  
• Juggles preventive care, chronic illness management, and minor emergencies daily.
  
  
• Feels personally insulted when patients say, "I just want a specialist."
  
  
• Catchphrase: "Let’s discuss lifestyle modifications."