The Family Group Chat: “So Can You Prescribe Me Something Real Quick?”

It’s 8:13 PM on a Sunday. You’ve just finished your shift, still in scrubs, holding a half-eaten sandwich. Your phone lights up with a ping.
It’s the family group chat.
And the message reads:

“Hey doc , can you prescribe me something real quick for this stomach thing? It’s probably nothing.”

Another ping. A cousin you haven’t spoken to in months:

“While you’re at it, can you check this mole on my back? Sending pic now…”

You sigh.

This isn’t just an occasional inconvenience—it’s a near-universal experience for doctors. Whether you’re a med student, intern, specialist, or just passed Step 1, the moment your family finds out you're in medicine, you're crowned the group’s personal 24/7 on-call consultant.

This article dives into the hilarious, frustrating, and ethically tangled world of being the unofficial family doctor—simply because of a degree you can’t hang up at the hospital door.

The Instant Authority You Never Asked For

You could still be in your first year of med school, struggling to pronounce “acetaminophen,” and someone will message:

“You’re basically a doctor now, right? What’s this rash?”

The medical title confers instant authority in your family, regardless of where you are in your training or what field you’re in.

You’re suddenly:

A pediatrician (even if you’re in pathology)
A psychiatrist (even if you’re in surgery)
A dermatologist (because you own a phone)
A general practitioner on demand, available day or night, without appointments, fees, or documentation

It's flattering—until it becomes exhausting.

Why Families Feel It’s Okay to Ask

The reasoning is usually innocent enough:

“Why waste time and money at the doctor when we have one in the family?”
“It’s just a quick question—nothing serious.”
“You’re a doctor; this must be second nature to you.”
“You know I hate clinics.”
“We trust you more than strangers.”

What they often fail to realize is:

You can’t offer safe advice without a proper clinical evaluation
Vague complaints and blurry photos aren’t enough for real diagnosis
Prescribing medications casually carries real consequences
You’re legally responsible—even if it was “just a suggestion”
You’re emotionally involved—it’s family, after all

The Ethical and Legal Landmine

Even with good intentions, treating family is riddled with risks:

You might miss a diagnosis due to emotional bias
You’re likely skipping a comprehensive workup
There’s no official documentation or follow-up
You’re taking on liability without proper safeguards
Personal and professional boundaries become blurred

The American Medical Association explicitly advises against treating close family members unless in an emergency.

But explaining that to Aunt Salma when she’s certain she needs antibiotics “just in case” can ignite a full-blown family argument.

The Most Common “Quick” Requests

Let’s be honest—these requests are usually copy-paste in nature. You start to recognize the pattern:

“I think I have a UTI. Can you send something to the pharmacy?”
“My child has a fever. Can I skip the ER?”
“I’m anxious and flying tomorrow. Just need a couple pills.”
“This rash looks bad. What cream should I use?”
“I think it’s strep again. Can you hook me up?”
“I forgot my BP meds. Can you refill and send to this city?”

What they mean:

“You’re family, you’re convenient, and you’re fast—fix it.”

The Emotional Tug-of-War

You love your family deeply. No question there.
But you’re also a trained and licensed professional—not a vending machine for prescriptions.

And yet, saying “no” feels:

Cold
Arrogant
Like you've changed since med school
As if you're hiding something they believe they deserve to know

You're torn between two identities:

The responsible doctor who follows protocols
The sibling or cousin who doesn’t want to disappoint

That internal conflict takes its toll.

The Risk of Becoming the Family Crutch

The more you comply:

The more they avoid real medical care
The more serious issues get minimized because “you’re keeping an eye”
The more they expect quick fixes without diagnostics
The harder it becomes to say no in the future

And the danger isn’t hypothetical.

That “minor rash” could be herpes zoster in an immunocompromised relative.
That “stomach bug” might actually be appendicitis.
Do you want to carry that responsibility?

Strategies for Protecting Your Boundaries Without Losing Your Family

1. Set expectations early.
   “I’m happy to give general advice, but I can’t prescribe or diagnose without a proper exam.”
   
   
2. Blame the rules.
   “My license restricts me from treating family. It’s legally risky for both of us.”
   
   
3. Offer limited support.
   “Here’s what to look out for, but please see a doctor.”
   “I’ll help you prepare your notes for your visit.”
   “Let’s go through your symptoms together before your actual consult.”
   
   
4. Stay warm—but firm.
   Clear communication delivered with kindness avoids future resentment.
   

When You Can Help—Responsibly

There are ways to support your family without crossing ethical lines:

Helping interpret labs after they’ve seen a physician
Explaining diagnoses or management plans
Going through medication interactions
Helping them ask better questions during appointments
Offering emotional support in navigating chronic illness
Giving perspective—not prescriptions

This is advocacy, not clinical care.

The Mental Load of Being “The Doctor in the Group Chat”

It’s a weight few talk about:

You’re constantly on-call—even during holidays and family dinners
You juggle real work pressure with emotional family needs
You overthink your responses and worry about the fallout
You carry guilt when they don’t follow your advice
You feel trapped—damned if you help, damned if you don’t

It’s relentless.
And you deserve peace.

Final Thoughts: You’re Not a Bad Relative for Setting Boundaries

You didn’t suffer through years of lectures, sleepless nights, and rotations just to be the family’s free 24/7 clinic.

You became a doctor to help people the right way—with evidence-based, legal, safe care.

So the next time your phone lights up with:

“So can you prescribe me something real quick?”

You’re not wrong for responding:

“I care about you deeply—but I can’t treat you. Let me help you find someone who can.”

Because real love sometimes looks like setting boundaries. And professional integrity? That’s the most loving kind of care you can offer.