A abdominal pain - abominable pain, abominal pain Achilles tendon - akilese tendon acid reflux - acid reflex acidophilus - Sid and Phylis ADHD - HDHD anesthesia - anesceasia astigmatism - a stigmatism accurate I/Os - accurate eyes and nose acute angina - a cute vagina albuterol - albootaral, albooteral, buterol, albuteral allergic reaction - allergic erection Alzheimer's - alltimers, alztimers, old timers disease, oltimers, Ambien - ambria Amiodarone - amiroaderone, am-knee-darone, amniodarone, amarodorone, amiorodarone, amidrone ambulance - ambleeance, ambalance, ambulambs aneurysm - amarysm antecubital - anticubical anthrax - amtracks antibiotics - antibygolics appendix - APNDX, pendix, appendicks, ipendics appendectomy - appleectomy, add-a-dick-to-me arthritis - The Arthur, arthuritis ask - axe aspirin - assburn asthma - assma, azma, Assmatack - instead of asthma attack Atenolol - atenol, atanol, atenenol, atenotol, antennanol atrial fibrillation - aerial fibaration Augmentin - augmentum, augiementim B barbiturates - bar-bit**-uates, bar-bi-tirades Bartholin gland - bartholomew gland below the knee amputation - baloney amputation between - bequeen bipolar - bipolo bisacodyl - biskadill bladder cancer - ladder cancer blood clot - blood clog, blood clock blood pressure cuff - blood pressure cup Botox - buttocks bowel obstruction - bowel destruction bowel impaction - bowel compaction bronchial asthma - broccoli asthma BUN - bunt bupropion - buproprion Buspar - badspar C CABG - cabbage C-section - sea section calcium - kalshium callus - callous candida infection - Canada infection capnography - capneography carbon monoxide - carpet monoxide cardioversion - cardio conversion Cardizem - cardiazem, cardliazem carotid - care-ih-toid carpal tunnel - corporal punishment, carpal thunnel, car trouble, carpool tunnel cataract - Cadillac catheter - Catholic, capiter cecum - secum cellulitis - cellulititis cerebral palsy - Sarah palsy, celebral palsy, chicken pocks - chicken pops Chiropractor - choirpracter cholesterol - chlorolesteral ciprofloxacin - ciproflucloxacillen cirrhosis of the liver - psoriasis of the liver, sclerosis of the liver, scoliosis of the liver, six roaches of the liver cocci - cockeye Colonoscopy - colonsclopy, colostomy, colonostomy, colonostrophy, coloscopy concussion - concrussion constipation - constickation contractions - contraptions congestive heart failure - congested heart failin Coumadin - coodamin, coumanin, coudamin, cummin, cooligan, cumiden coxsackie virus - coxsuckie virus CPAP - C-Pak cryo - Cairo D D&C - DNC dependent - dependant dehydrated - dehydrinated depo provera - depo primavera diabetes - diabetis, suga' diabetes, the sugar, diabettys, diabeets, dabeets, da' suga diabetic - diabetical, "sugar pill" diagnoses - diagnosises diarrhea - diarear, diareah dialysis - dinealysis, dryalysis, dialogy dialyze - dialasize, diagnalysis dilated - delighted disoriented - disorientated defibrillator - defibulator, defibrillizer, fibulizor, fibalator Diflucan - diflunkin Dilaudid - di lada, duodenum, dilautin, dialauda, dilauda, dilaudin, dilala, dilauden, diladeed, dilila, dilidad, dulauda, dilada, dilauntin, dilopadid, diladoo, dilauscious, lidaudid, dilowdin, dilautin, dilaudah, laudedid, diloodid, dahlonega, darvonidad, dull adam, dillydad, diladid, dialed in, diddlyadid, mili of dili, delightful, delighted, dddd, dilapida, diludid, the d one, dilaudemerol, delawtid, dolobid, dildemerol diltiazem - ditazolam diverticulitis - diberticulitis dominant - dominit doppler - gobbler, dobbler donepezil - donzepril. dry weight - dry wall Dulcolax - dookielax E eczema - exema, eggs and ma edematous - edeminous, ah-did-ah-mus EKG - heartmagram Elavil - elaville electrolytes - electric lights elephantiasis - elephantitis elicit - illicit emphysema - infazima encephalitis - syphilitis epidural - epidermal epigastric - epic gastric epileptic seizure - epileptic Caesar, eucalyptus seizure erectile dysfunction - reptile dysfunction esophagus - asophagues exacerbation - exaspiration, asserbation, exagerbate excercise - ectercise excruciating - cruciating extubation - excavation F fibroids in my uterus - fireballs in my Eucharist (or universe or Eucharis), thyroids in my uterus fibromyalgia - ibromyfalgia, fibermalgia, fibermanalgia, fibro-my-algia, fibroidmyalga, fibermyallergy fibroplastic breast - fiber optic breast Flomax - flowmore folic acid - fostic acid foramen ovale - foraminal valley Furosemide - forcemide, fersamide G gabapentin - gabbagantin gallbladder - gullbladder, jawbladder, gallblatter gangrene - gang green generic - genetic Glucophage - glucasausage GoLYTELY - gollytelly gout - goat, gouch grand mal seizure - grandma seizure, grand maul seizure, grand mall seizure Guillian-Barre syndrome - gougane barra syndrome H Haldol - hound dog, haldog heart catheterization - heart cardization heart murmur - heart mummer Heimlich maneuver - hindlick maneuver, Heinekin maneuver, hemoptysis - hymnoptosis hemorrhoidectomy - hermitrectomy heparin - hefarin heroin - heroine herpes - hair piece HCTZ - HTCZ hernia - hyena hiatal hernia - hi herny, hymenal hernia, high anal hernia HIPAA - HIPPA, HIPPO high bilirubin - hi Billy Rubin hill - heel hospitalist - hospital list hydralazine - hydrazaline hydrocodone - hydrocodeine, hydrocordone, hydracodeine, hydrocordrone, hyda coda done hydromorphone - hydramofo hypertension - the pressure, high blood hypoxic - hypopnic hysterectomy - hickerectomy, histamyrectomy, hykterektomy, hicktorectomy, hikorekomy I ibuprofin - I-B profin, I-B-U rofin, ibupropylene, ibubufferin I have sinusitis - I have sinuses impetigo - infantigo induced in L&D - instead of reduced in L&D, seduced in L&D intractable - intrackable inflammation - inflamminated inhaler - inhalator intubated - incubated ipratropium - ipatropin irritable bowel syndrome - durable bowel syndrome, herbal bowl syndrome J K L laparoscopic - laptoscopical larynx - larnix Lasix - Lasik, latex lisinopril - lisopril Lorazepam - razorpam Lortab - Loratab, lowtads Lyme disease - lime disease Lyrica - lycra lymph nodes - lymph noides, limp noids M maggots - magnets mammogram - mammy o gram, mammiogram, mammeogram melatonin pills - melanoma pills MRSA infection - merser infection malnutrition - maltrishoning mastectomy - masectomy menopause - many paws, menapause, minipause menstruation - minstration Methotrexate - mexotrexate metoprolol - meto-prolol, metaprod, me-prot-olol, met-RO-polol, meta-pro-lol, metopropolol, metopotol, matropalol, metepropol, metoprol, metopropol, meta-topro-lol migraine headache - migratin headache, my brain headache milligrams - thrilligrams mitral valve - micral valve morphine - mo phine, mophy, mofeen, mofeem MRSA - MERCA multiple sclerosis - multiple scoliosis, multiple neurosis mupirocin - mop-u-rock-in muscle - mustle "My bone wasn't broken, only fractured" myocardial infarction - myocardial infraction, cardio fart N nauseous - nauseaouas nauseated - nauseation nebulizer - nibulator, febulizer, nebalizer, mebulizer Nissen - neesan Norvasc - norvasac NSAIDS - nay-sayds nuclear test - nuculer test, nook-ya-lar O omeprazole - o-mee-pra-zo-lee, o-mep-ra-zo-le, om-nep-praz-olol, "o something" ophthalmology - opthalmology, optamology, optomology orient - orientate oriented - orientated osteochondral - osteocondo, osteocondom osteoperosis - osteosperosis Oxycodone - oxycordone Oxycontin - oxycotton oxygen - oxgen, octagon, oxcuagen P pacemaker - peacemaker palpate - palpitate pancreatitis - pancreitis pap smear - pepper smear paraneoplastic panel - perineal plastic panel patients - patience Percocet - purpocet, percostat, purpacet, perpocet perfusion - profusion pericarditis - periocarditis perineal - peroneal peripheral - peripherial pharynx - pharnix Phenergan - finnagin, phenergrin, phen-a-kin, phenergun, phenegren, pheneegan, phenagrin, phenegram, phenygen, phennygin, phenergran, vinegar, phenegran, fingin, fennigan phenobarbitol - peanut butter balls phlebotomy - lobotomy pitocin - potassium Plavix - playvix, pavlix pleural - plural pneumonia - ammonia, lamonia, numonia, phemonia polyps - plopps, pollits Port-A-Cath - portacast prednisone - presinone, pregnisone prescribe - perscribe prescriptions - perscriptions Prevalon boot - provolone boot Prilosec - prolosex Propofol - propothol, propathal propranolol - propanolol prostate - prostrate, prospate Protonix - protronix Prozac - prosack PSA - PSI pseudoseizures - sudo seizures pulmonary - plumbinary, pluminary pulmonary embolism - pulmonary emblems pneumonia - ammonia, lemonia, pamonia, p moan ya pyelonephritis - polynehpritis Q R Ramipril - ram-per-il rectal pain - rektical pain reflux - reflexin reflux on my esophagram - reflexes on my coffeegram rhabdomyolysis - rhabdomyolitis rheumatoid arthritis - rumatard arfritis, rumortard arthritis ringworms - wingworms Risperdal - risperidal Rocephin - rocepherin rotator cuff - rotor cup, rotary cuff, roterer cuff, rotator cup, rotary cup RSV - RSVP S saddle pulmonary embolism - saddled pulmonary embolism sats - stats (an in oxygen stats) Schizophrenia - schitzophrenia sciatic nerve - psychotic nerve, exotic nerve, psychiatic nerve, sanotic nerve seizures - skezures Seroquel - sequel shotty lymph nodes - shoddy lymph nodes sickle cell anemia- sick as Hell anemia sleep apnea - sleep apney, sleep napia something - sompin smoking cessation classes - smoking sensation classes spayed - spaded (for the vets out there!) specific pain - Pacific pain spinal meningitis - smiley mighty Jesus spironolactone - spy-ra-lone-a-lack-ta-tone Staph infection - staff infection stent - stint, splints, stimps Strep throat - strip throat , script throat, scrip throat stroke - scroke sulfa - sulfur suppositories - depositories Synagis - synergist T telemetry - the lemon tree, telepathy tendonitis - tendernitis testicles - technicals tests - testes Tetanus shot - technical shot Theophylline - thee-o-fi-lean throat - instead of throak thrombocytopenia - instead of thrombocytopenis thrush - thrash TIAs - teeahs topical nystatin - tropical nystatin Toprol - topal trachea - trachlear Trazodone - tray-za-done trichomonas infection - tracheotomy infection, trick infection, trick a monkey infection troponins - patronins tubal ligation - tubal langee-on, tubal litigation, tubolization Tylenol - tylol, tylenoids, time in all Tysabri - tysaybri U uvula - vulva umbilical - umbiblical V vagina - vajinga, Virginia, pajama vaginal discharge - virginal discharge Valium - vacuum vegetations - vegetables ventilator - emulator vertigo - vertical, vertago vesicle - vesical Viagra - viagry Vicoden - vickoden, vi-code-an, vicodan, vicaden volatile - voluatable vomit - vomick vomiting - vomicken, vomicking Vulva - instead of uvula W warfarin - wahfehrn, warafin Wenckebach - winkyback welts - whelps wheezing - weasel whopping cough - woofing cough X Xopenex - zofenex x-ray - x-tray, x-ration Z Zofran - jofrain Zosyn - josin Source
